April 2011
1 post
Superb beer →
March 2011
2 posts
The Road by Cormac McCarthy
haikubookreview:
Bleak, gray and hopeless
A long walk, father and son
OH SHIT! CANNIBALS!
Check out my new tumblr!
http://haikubookreview.tumblr.com/
I’ve been having an arguably productive morning…
February 2011
7 posts
I just learned from this list: Oscar winners: best to worst, that The Maltese Falcon and Citizen Kane came out in the same year, and they both lost to some shit called How Green is My Valley. I haven’t seen the latter but it sounds like a PSA about gonorrhea.
I also thought that Shakespeare in Love beating Saving Private Ryan should have been the #1 unfair win, but Crash was a pretty...
I’m addicted to jackets. I’m a sick man.
January 2011
6 posts
3 tags
This interesting syndrome can result from... →
Hot Chocolate with a Kick
I just made a cup of hot chocolate with a sliver of Naga Jolokia pepper (second hottest in the world after a recent upset) and a dash of ground chipotle. Both of which were given to me by an unnamed benefactor as part of a thank-you gift for carrying them a short distance while they happened to be covered in tears and vomit.
Long story short… hot cocoa success. Two kinds of hot, twice as...
December 2010
6 posts
The matrix trilogy boxed set comes with the Matrix and two shiny coasters to keep condensation from damaging your coffee table.
The lunar eclipse was even boring when viewed as a 2 minute long time lapse video. There, I said what we were all thinking.
How to make your very own hipster:
Mix equal parts Paul Bunyan, Luigi from Super Mario and a Rabbi. Shake to the beat of a song that not many people have heard.
People(s) that suck but still make lots of money:
Tim Burton
M. Night Shamalamalamalan
Phish
November 2010
1 post
I've been' sayin' it all along. →
October 2010
7 posts
My movie idea #1: Joint Custody
In this cleverly titled comedy flick with a heart, a group of do-nothing stoners, through a series of cosmic Rube Goldberg-like events, find themselves the adoptive caretakers of a 3 year old child. Through their silly mistakes they all learn something about friendship and responsibility. In the meantime, hilarity ensues.
“Fox asked me, Hey can that guy with the pointing come over?
I said the guy with...”
– Betsy, quoting her Nanny charge. I gave him a test of vocabulary in which you have to point at correct pictures last week for a school assignment.
True
Also This →
Some great ideas for metal band names that came to...
chorionic villus
toxic shock
amy thrasher
I found a website at which one can copy and paste into a text box, translate that text into Morse code, and play that code as audio.
I am now proofreading a paper with my eyes closed.
special addendum: I can in no capacity understand More code.
today I saw a woman standing on the corner with a handwritten cardboard sign. she looked slightly too well-dressed to be begging. when i got closer, i read her sign:
______________
botox
GIVE BOOBS
______________
i don’t understand.
September 2010
6 posts
“Ahh, the memories of you standing on your chair naked at the kitchen table...”
– Elana, my 14 years older sister
July 2010
8 posts
http://nymag.com/movies/profiles/67284/ →
1 tag
1 tag
1 tag
Things I learn Man-nannying
A physicist who says matter can be neither created nor destroyed has never seen a 40 pound kid take a 50 pound shit.
also, while changing the diaper in question:
4 year old: “that’s a lot of poo-poo. it looks like a sandwich”
me: “no, it doesn’t look ANYTHING like a sandwich”
June 2010
1 post
Go tumble yourself
May 2010
3 posts
Fleetwood Mac and Cheese
1/2 pound elbow macaroni
3 tablespoons butter
3 tablespoons flour
3 cups milk
COCAINE
12 ounces sharp cheddar, shredded
1 teaspoon kosher salt
Fresh black pepper
April 2010
3 posts
Ah, the joys of being a nanny to two 4 year old...
Jasper: “Hey Alexander, did you know that we live in the “Nited States”? Alexander: “It’s always night in space.”
